* * *
I wake up about 3 hours before my alarm, refreshed. In the shower, I make sure to shave my legs…and my privates. Every part of me needs to be smooth to the touch.
I soothe my warm body with a lotion that claims to smell like rose and lavender. I do my hair, perfectly. My makeup is on point: not too much, just a little touch up of my best features. My outfit is well coordinated and hugs me in all the right places. (And the color…well, it’s always red.)
…and then I realize I still have about 2 more hours until I have to get to work.
But that doesn’t get me down. What is time, anyway? I make some coffee but forget to drink it. I don’t know what hungry feels like anymore.
I’m making plans. So many fucking plans! I know how to turn my career around, I know the people I need to get in touch with. Emails are sent. Facebook is reactivated…because well, I’m fucking social again! I want to connect with everyone and everything. Humanity isn’t doomed after all… I may have figured out a way to save it.
One more hour till work.
I rip off my red dress and pull my hair back. I climb into bed and wake him up. First, just kissing. He tells me to go away. He’s sleeping. But of course, I don’t. I kiss his neck and he tries to resist. But I know he can’t. I work my way down from his chest, to his stomach, to his very happy dick. Good morning.
I can feel my co-workers checking me out as I walk into work. I look pretty fucking amazing. That just fucked flush in my cheeks compliments my red dress quite well.
My boss tells me I’m on point today. That I’m doing a fantastic job. All I’m thinking is how much I want to fuck him in the bathroom. And then once again in his office. I smile and walk away. If only he knew.
I tackle my work projects with efficiency and grace. My co-workers ask me what I’m on and start laughing. I laugh with them, maybe a little too much. I can’t sit still. How can I work in this shitty place when I have so many plans? I need to log all of my ideas into my phone before it’s too late. I can’t forget. I have to follow through this time.
How the heck am I home already? Where did the day go? I miss him. I wish he wasn’t away on business. Why does he always enjoy leaving me? Maybe I should eat something. No, porn first. I wish I had the guts to go out to a bar and meet a stranger, but hey, this will do.
Somehow it’s midnight already and I’ve written four short stories, drafted a business plan and organized my closet. Need to sleep. But still not tired. This can’t go on tomorrow. God I hope I don’t crash. I can’t wait until my psychiatrist prescribes me something for sleep. Maybe if I just climb into bed…
2 am. 3 am. 4 a.m.
Rise and shine.