Clarity

With the hypomania setting in yesterday, I wasn’t sure if I’d fall asleep last night. I was up late, but I managed to get decent sleep. I woke up this morning feeling...clear. It’s the first time I’ve felt this way in a long time. The daze has temporarily lifted and I feel like a normal person. A person with normal emotions, thoughts… a person that isn’t thinking about killing or starving herself.

I woke up this morning, made some tea and read a book.

I was nice to my significant other.

I cleaned the apartment…in a non-frenzied way.

It was amazing. It’s the little things, right?

I want this to last. I want this to last without medication. I want to feel like myself. Sadly, with this illness, that is too much to ask for. I just hope to feel this way for a bit longer. I want savor it, take it in.

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